Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Really?

Last night I got home from work and it was late...of course. This working 9:30 am til 8:00 pm sucks. Bad.

Well, TC really doesn't even want to spend time with me. He always wants Sara. And Sara said, "He thinks I am his mom now." Seriously wtf? Sometimes it just is not fun being a responsible working adult.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Judgments

I work with a lady who has a son with autism. He is not as high functioning as TC. She and I talk a lot about our boys. It is nice to bond with someone who "gets it". One lady who sits beside me started talking about bad kids the other day and I mentioned my autistic son. I told her I am sure I was judged for TC's behavior and she said, "Well your son is sick, you can always tell." I told her, "No, you can't look at my son and tell he is autistic. It is not like being in a wheel chair, it is not that obvious." I could tell she was just clueless. The thing is, this woman had a stroke a couple of years ago, she is in her 40's and she is so judgmental, I cannot stand that.

But anyways, that is our society. I talk to people everyday, and some of them are mentally handicapped. I try to treat every person I talk to with kindness and especially those who are a little slower mentally. They are people too and deserve kindness. That could be you or me, one thing could happen: a car accident, a stroke, ANYTHING could change your mental capacity. We have no control over life.

Having a special needs child is very challenging. It is frustrating. It can be sad and you wish things could be easier. I think of where TC should be instead of in a special needs classroom....barely learning to read. He should be in a normal 4th grade classroom next year. But he won't be and some days it is a hard pill to swallow. I don't think about it much but I do think about it. I don't cry about it anymore, I accept it. It has made me stronger, better, more understanding and that is a blessing.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Autism and frustrations

School is officially out and well....things have been a little challenging. Maybe it is the hotter weather, maybe it is school being out and TC being more anxiety-ridden. I really don't know what it is.

TC has had his good and bad days. Yesterday I took the kids to a pool in the next town. So today of course, TC wanted to go back . We got sunburned and I told him we need to get better and we can go back to the big pool next week...but I went and got him a little pool. He was mad because it was not a big pool. He kept saying over and over, "Mom you lied to me. That pool is too small for me." And it is small, but it will be okay til' I can get him something bigger.

And Sara had a friend over last night so when we got home he was upset that the friend was gone. He went on and on about how he wants "A" (the girl) to come back and he almost cried over it. A lot of days he has a ton of anxiety and whines a LOT! I am working a lot of hours and when I get home, I simply cannot deal with his whiney-ness. It drives me nuts.

Also I am job hunting again because they changed my hours and I am working til' 8 p.m. every night. I have overtime all next week so I will be at work from 9:30 am til 8:00 pm every day.
Hopefully TC's anxiety will lessen. Actually right now he is being really calm.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Summer is here!

School is officially out! Woo hoo!!!!

But these last couple of days have been tough.
With any changes that come along TC has difficulties.
His anxiety is at an all time high. It seems it takes him hours and hours to
calm down and behave.

I know a lot of it is not his fault but it is sooooooooo frustrating!!
Yesterday we went to see X Men and his behavior was out of control.
We kept telling him to chill out and behave but it was not getting any better.

We did go see the movie, which was great...I was a little upset about
one part where the "f" word was used. That is a word TC uses and he gets in deep trouble
every time I hear it. (he has used it 2 or 3 times this past week)
TC knows saying bad words is wrong but I think he has such impulse control problems that he
cannot help it some days. STILL he gets in trouble for it.

We try to deal with TC's anxiety and we don't want to medicate him but I wonder if one day it will come to that. Right now, he is 9 years old, and I feel it is managable. It may not always be that way.

Sigh.

We are just taking it day to day!