Try a little harder!

With Billy's passing, I have tried to do a lot of thinking. I have thought about my relationships. I have tried to change some of the ways I have done things.

I realize life is short and we have to take what we can get.
My family may not be there for me as much as I would like but I am willing to work hard to nurture our relationships.
I also understand that we can't change other people. They are who they are.

My husband sees things differently. He says he has to guard his heart. I think we all do, to an extent. But my husband feels alone a lot of the time. He doesn't really reach out to people. He doesn't really care about relationships with his family.

Until something like losing a family member happens. And I think he is hurt because some people have not reached out to him.

Even though I have done my best, and I am far from perfect, he has been lashing out at me. And it hurts because I am the ONE person who has been there for him for the last 15 years.

I told him last night that he needs to start trying to nurture some relationships.

It is time.

My day

TC was up this morning at 6:30. Of course he went back to sleep and I never did so I got up. I watched a little tv, got ready, went to Ace Hardware, the grocery store, post office, and Family Dollar.

I came home from all of that and had an argument with the Hubs and it was a doozie!
My husband thinks everybody is against him a lot of the time and it drives me insane. I have put in 15 years, haven't I done my time?? Haven't I proven that I am here to stay??

I went into the bathroom and had a breakdown. Maybe I needed it because I do feel better.

I vacuumed the bedrooms, loaded the dishwasher, cleaned the bathrooms, shocked the pool and changed the filter, and now I have 2 PowerPoint presentations to do. I'd better get busy!!